I went to mass this morning. It was the same as it is in Australia, and being the universal Church, one would expect that. The weird thing, though, was the accents. Obviously, I mean, the first thing anyone notices in another English speaking country is the accents, and it's not like I expected any different, but that's the thing; being so used to hearing American accents in movies and the like, then hearing Australian accents in normal life I couldn't shake the feeling during mass that everyone would let out a laugh and say, with broad Australian accents "the jokes on you" (along with a few gratuitous references to me as 'mate' and 'champ') and normality would return.
It never happened of course, for here I am, Vienna, Virginia; part of the greater DC area.
Speaking of accents, at LA Airport I thought it might be nice to have a coffee. So I went along to Starbucks. Looking at the menu, there were three coffee sizes: Tall, Grande and Liquid Heart Palpitation (I make no claims on the accuracy of the name of that last size). Who seriously wants a coffee the size of a McDonalds large coke? At least the cardboard is recyclable.
I thought I'd go with a Grande Cafe Latte, and heard the fellow in front of me order one as well with the emphasis on the e in the word Grande. The fine lady behind the counter called me sir and asked what I wanted. I, wanting to sound at least somewhat like I knew how to pronounce "Grande", in my most natural Australian accent, said something that must have sounded like "I'll have a Grundy Lattay thanks". She nodded and asked for a name, I say "Mullins", since that's my name and all and she wrote it on the side of the cup.
Quicker than a good coffee should, my hot beverage came and I looked at the side of my cup. Apparently I'd recieved the Grundy Lattay that belonged to a bloke called "Mellons".
Despite the size of the mid-range coffee, I still fell asleep in the depature lounge. Luckily, I had one of those half-awake dreams about tripping over and woke myself up with an involuntry spasm. It's amazing how acute embarrassment fast-tracks lucidity.
Right now, I'm sitting and chillaxing; watching a squirrel fart about in the backyard (I meant to write 'dart about' there, but decided that was a typo worth keeping). That seems like the plan for the rest of the day.
Until our paths cross once more, keep trucking.
Sam <>< ><> <>< <>< <><
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2 comments:
Grande, you say?
As your title suggests I hope it is on the way...
Ah just one thing of interest, when you said "mellons" did she look at you funny because when I read that I laughed very loud and for a while, a good while at that. If I remember anything from today it will be you saying in a broad aussie accent "Mellons" to a female employee of the fanastic seattle franchise called starbucks Hehehe. As a side note i went to Verve today and received a free coffee after Craigs initial "So hows it going?" and a quick tale of my past 24hrs, I was happy with the free kind gesture and said my goodbyes and kept my $3.50 for another day.
Thats my life on the side of Sams life.
By the way Sam if this annoys you at all just tell us and i'll stop! I thought it a good way for us to keep in touch and a bit of fun.
I know exactly what you mean by a Grande Latte. But next time try a Vanilla Grande Latte...it's what all the New Yorkers drink!
Also, the spasm is called Nocturnal Molicolus. And yes it is very funny. Enjoy the US and hope the toilets do not block while you're there.
Gill
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